the inevitable happened

the inevitable happened

i have been delaying this far too long. had it not been for a chewing gum incident which rendered a part of me broken, i wouldn't have. yes, i was terrified. ridicule me if you must. i'm 18 years old and i'm scared of the dentist (which, mind you did not keep me from having trips to the dentist prior to this incident). as a result the inevitable happened, i underwent a minor surgery, the extraction of my second molar.

i opened my mouth as the dentist surveyed my teeth.

"we're good to go. either you have tooth extraction or root canal.(handing me a mirror)"

root canal wasn't an option. i have decided. it's either you take it out or you do.

"extraction, doctor."

"but if we do, we would have to install a crown jacket. do you know what that is?"

i know doctor.. but humor me tell me what it is. stalling...

"no doctor"

"ok its like this, (holding out a mold), blah blah yadda yadda"

i couldn't care less about a stupid crown jacket. take it out pleeease.

"so that' it. what do you say?"

"uhmm... i'll ask my mom first"

"ok. open your mouth"

i opened my mouth and closed my eyes. the dentistry tools are too scary. this i cannot see. with eyes shut i felt her (the doctor is a she), rub flavored topical anesthesia on the affected gum.

"ok gargle first"

i did. blindly following orders. after which she gently massaged my cheek. the events that followed, the tools she used and everything else from there on (except lucid moments when she asked me to gargle) are remembered through closed eyes. i couldnt bear seeing the tools. i didnt know why. i have handled scarier looking tools in the OR but i just couldnt stand the sight of these implements being used on me. until all movement ceased...

"ayaw ka yatang hiwalayan ng ngipin mo..."

apparently they're having a hard time taking it out. it wont leave me. but i have decided. more force was introduced. i couldnt open my eyes. i consciously did not want to see their faces while taking it out.

then i felt it. freedom at last!

"ok tapos na."

her words were liberating. i opened my eyes. a feeling of relief and a weird sense of liberty overcame me. she made me bite hard on a ball of i didnt know what (at that time), to stop the bleeding i suppose.

it's over. my right jaw was numb and i felt my lips were so swollen and i couldnt feel a thing, but i felt relief.

at last its over. now i just have the post-surgical pains to deal with.